To win a Billiards League is tough,

There’s only one each year,

It takes a special recipe,

and I’ll share it with you here.

Take half a dozen players,

add a couple of subs,

Blend a smooth consistency,

and place them in a club.

Elect yourselves a Captain,

Add passion, pride and flair,

Instill some dogged disciplines,

and you’re half way there.

Some luck is essential,

So do not overlook,

That practise is required,

If well you wish to cook.

Pop your mixture to the heat,

Bring quickly to the boil,

There are early points up for grabs,

You must not let them spoil.

Make winning your best habit,

Though smile come what may,

There has to be enjoyment,

Whatever game you play,

Check your league position,

Believe you have a glimmer,

Lose your "prima donnas",

But keep things on the simmer.

Enter latter stages,

The heat, now keep it hot,

Every game, it must be won,

Deservedly or not.

Heroic fluent victories,

Fuel your inspirations,

Now the final game is here,

So take your battle stations.

Lager, coke and cider,

Helps to soothe the nerves,

A really big performance,

Is asked of all reserves.

Hard fought points collected,

Then Captain ‘O’ Delightful,

Hooray ! The lads have done it,

Yes, we’ve won the Title.

So now, unlike this little rhyme,

Which really ain’t that neat,

We know to win a Billiard League,